Stories of a Life | Redux | Do You Kiss Your Mother With That Mouth?

Traveling on a train across Europe, with a Eurail Pass, in the 1970s

In the summer of 1974, Cathy and I travelled to Europe for a three-month European summer vacation, BritRail and Eurail passes in hand, this was going to be a summer vacation to keep in our memory for always.

And so it proved to be …

On another day, in another post evoking memories of our cross-continental European sabbatical, I’ll relate more stories of what occurred that summer.

Train travel in Spain, in the 1970s, as the train makes its way around the bend

Only 10 days prior to the event I am about to relate, Cathy and I had arrived in Lisbon, Portugal, alighting from a cruise liner we’d boarded in Southampton, England (passage was only 5£s, much cheaper than now).

After a couple of wonderful days in Lisbon, Cathy and I embarked on the first part of our hitchhiking journey throughout every portion of Portugal we could get to, finally traveling along the Algarve before arriving in the south of the country, ready to board a train to Spain. Unfortunately, I developed some intestinal disorder or other, requiring rest and fluids. Once Cathy could see that I was going to be fine, she left the confines of our little pensão to allow me to recover in peace, returning with stories of her having spent a wonderful day at the beach with an enthusiastic retinue of young Portuguese men, who had paid attention to and flirted with her throughout the day. Cathy was in paradisiacal heaven; me, not so much.

Still, I was feeling better, almost recovered from my intestinal malady, and the two of us made a decision to be on our way the next morning.

Traveling from the south of Portugal to Spain, in the 1970s

To say that I was in a bad mood when I got onto the train is to understate the matter. On the way to the station, who should we run into but the very group of amorous men Cathy had spent the previous day with, all of whom were beside themselves that this braless blonde goddess of a woman was leaving their country, as they beseeched her to “Stay, please stay.” Alas, no luck for them; this was my wife, and we were going to be on our way.

Still suffering from the vestiges of both an irritable case of jealousy and a now worsening intestinal disorder, I was in a foul mood once we got onto the train, and as we pulled away from the station, my very loud and ill-tempered mood voiced in intemperate English, those sitting around us thinking that I must be some homem louco, and not wishing in any manner to engage.

A few minutes into my decorous rant, a young woman walked up to me, and asked in the boldest terms possible …

Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?

“Huh,” I asked?

“Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? That’s the filthiest mouth I’ve ever heard. You’ve got to teach me how to swear!”

At which point, she sat down across from me, her lithe African American dancer companion moving past me to sit next to her.

“Susan. My name is Susan. This is my friend, Danelle,” she said, pointing in the direction of Danelle. “We’re from New York. We go to school there. Columbia. I’m in English Lit. Danelle’s taking dance — not hard to tell, huh? You two traveling through Europe, are you?” Susan all but shouted. “I come from a large Jewish family. You? We’re traveling through Europe together.”

And thus began a beautiful friendship. Turns out that Susan could swear much better than I could; she needed no instruction from me. Turns out, too, that she had my number, and for all the weeks we traveled together through Europe, Susan had not one kind word for me, as she set about to make my life hell — and I loved every minute of it. Susan became the sister I wished I’d had: profane, self-confident, phenomenally bright and opinionated, her acute dissection of me done lovingly and with care, to this day one of the best, most loving relationships I’ve ever had.

Little known fact about me: I love being called out by bright, emotionally healthy, socially-skilled and whole women.

Two-year-old Jude Nathan Tomlin, baby Megan Jessica, and dad, Raymond, in June 1977
The summer of 1974, when Cathy became pregnant with Jude, on the right above.

Without the women in my life, Cathy or Megan, my daughter — when Cathy and I separated — Lori, Justine, Alison, Patricia, Julienne or Melissa, each of whom loved me, love me still, and made me a better person, the best parts of me directly attributable to these lovely women, to whom I am so grateful for caring enough about me to make me a better person.

Once Susan and I had settled down — there was an immediate connection between Susan and I, which Cathy took as the beginnings of an affair the two of us would have (as if I would sleep with my sister — Danelle, on the other hand, well … perhaps a story for another day, but nothing really happened, other than the two of us becoming close, different from Susan).

J. D. Salinger's Nine Stories, an anthology of short stories published in April 1953

 

Danelle saw a ragged copy of J.D. Salinger’s Nine Stories peeking out of Cathy’s backpack. “Okay,” she said. “In rounds, let’s each one of us give the title of one of the Salinger short stories,” which we proceeded to do.

Cathy was just now reading Salinger, while I’d read the book while we were still in England, about three weeks earlier.

Cathy started first, For Esmé — with Love and Squalor. Danelle, Teddy. Susan, showing off, came up with A Perfect Day for Bananafish, telling us all, “That story was first published in the January 31, 1948 edition of The New Yorker.” Show off! I was up next, and came up with Uncle Wiggily in Connecticut. Phew — just barely came up with that one! Thank goodness.

Onto the second round: Cathy, Down at the Dinghy; Danelle, Pretty Mouth and Green My Eyes; Susan, showing off again, De Daumier-Smith’s Blue Period, “turned down by The New Yorker in late 1951, and published by the British Information World Review, early in 1952.”

Me? Struggling yet again, but subject to a momentary epiphany, I blurted out, Just Before the War with the Eskimos. There we were, eight stories down and one to go.

But do you think any one of us could come up with the title to the 9th tale in Salinger’s 1953 anthology of short stories? Nope. We thought about it, and thought about it — and nothing, nada, zero, zilch. We racked our brains, and we simply couldn’t come up with the title of the 9th short story.

We sat there, hushed. For the first time in about half an hour, there was silence between us, only the voices of children on the train, and the clickety-clack of the tracks as the train headed relentlessly towards Madrid.

We couldn’t look at one another. We were, as a group, downcast, looking up occasionally at the passing scenery, only furtively glancing at one another, only periodically and with reservation, as Cathy held onto my arm, putting hers in mine.

Danelle looking up, she too wishing for human contact.

Finally, Susan looked up at me, looked directly at me, her eyes steely and hard yet … how do I say it? … full of love and confidence in me, that I somehow would be the one to rescue us from the irresolvable dilemma in which we found ourselves.

Beseechingly, Susan’s stare did not abate …

The Laughing Man,” I said, “The Laughing Man! The 9th story in Salinger’s anthology is …” and before I could say the words, I was smothered in kisses, Cathy to my left, Susan having placed herself in my lap, kissing my cheeks, my lips, my forehead, and when she found herself unable to catch her breath, Danelle carrying on where Susan had left off, more tender than Susan, loving and appreciative, Cathy now holding me tight, love all around us.

A moment that will live in me always, a gift of the landscape of my life.

Most Anticipated Films of 2024’s First Six Months

Summer blockbusters, action-packed thrillers, sweet rom-coms, and much-anticipated sequels are all on the upcoming movie slate for 2024.

2024 at the movies promises to be one for the books, especially with the long-awaited releases of a surfeit of films that were delayed for release until 2024, as a result of the strike of WGA and SAG-AFTRA members last spring and summer.

From dramatic biopics like Bob Marley: One Love and the Amy Winehouse film Back to Black to epic sequels like Dune: Part Two, as well as a surfeit of movies pushed back from 2023, this new year is already shaping up to be a wild year in film.

Here’s a list of the 26 most anticipated Hollywood releases set to hit your local multiplex in 2024, between now and the end of June.

Argylle (Feb. 2). Matthew Vaughn returns to the espionage genre in a new movie that follows a spy novelist (Bryce Dallas Howard) who, unbeknownst to her, is writing real-life events into her beloved books series. Sam Rockwell, Henry Cavill and Bryan Cranston also star, alongside pop star Dua Lipa.

Lisa Frankenstein (Feb. 9). The campy, young adult take on the Mary Shelley classic sees a high schooler re-animate a corpse who turns out to be a love interest. The movie is the feature début from Zelda Williams and features a screenplay from Jennifer’s Body scribe Diablo Cody.

Madame Web (Feb. 14). Dakota Johnson leads this Spider-Man spinoff as a clairvoyant who becomes entangled with multiple superheroes.

Bob Marley: One Love (Feb. 14). The biopic of Jamaican singer-songwriter Bob Marley comes from King Richard director Reinaldo Marcus Green and stars Kingsley Ben-Adir as Marley, the film following the singer’s rise, and personal and political journey.

Dune: Part Two (March 1). This follow-up to Denis Villeneuve’s first Dune was originally set for release in 2023. The sequel picks up with Paul Atreides (Timothée Chalamet) looking to avenge his family line. Austin Butler and Christopher Walken join the cast that is also led by Zendaya.

Road House (March 21). Patrick Swayze’s 1989 action flick is getting a 2024 re-do thanks to director Doug Liman, with Jake Gyllenhaal taking over the starring role as an ex-UFC fighter turned bouncer.

The American Society of Magical Negroes (March 22). Set for a Sundance 2024 début later this month, this featurefrom comedian and satirist Kobi Libii follows a young man who’s recruited into a secret society of Black people who are meant to make white people’s lives easier. Justice Smith leads this Focus Features project.

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire (March 29). After revitalizing the franchise with 2021’s Ghostbusters: Afterlife, stars Carrie Coon, Finn Wolfhard, Mckenna Grace and Paul Rudd return to team up with original Ghostbusters stars Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Ernie Hudson and Annie Potts as they attempt to save New York.

Mickey 17 (March 29). The new film from director Bong Joon-ho, his first since his Oscar-winning Parasite, stars Robert Pattinson as a “expendable” employee sent to colonize a foreign world.

The First Omen (April 5). Nell Tiger Free stars in the prequel to the classic Richard Donner film. The project kicks off when a young American woman moves to Rome in service of the church, only to encounter a mysterious darkness. Tawfeek Barhom, Sonia Braga, Ralph Ineson and Bill Nighy also star in the project, from.filmmaker Arkasha Stevenson.

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (April 12). Godzilla vs. Kong filmmaker Adam Wingard returns with a film that teams Godzilla and Kong set to face off against previously hidden monstrous Titans. Rebecca Hall, Brian Tyree Henry and Dan Stevens are on board as the human stars.

Challengers (April 26). Another holdover from 2023 pushed due to the actors strike, this Luca Guadagnino film stars Zendaya as a tennis star turned coach in a love triangle with competing champions. Josh O’Connor & Mike Faist co-star.

Civil War (April 26). This Alex Garland movie is set after the United States has fallen into a state of civil war, and follows reporters as they try to traverse the fractured and increasingly dangerous country. Kirsten Dunst, her husband Jesse Plemons, Nick Offerman and Priscilla’s Cailee Spaeny co-star.

Idea of You (May 2). The beloved romance novel is turned into a romantic comedy. Michael Showalter directs and Anne Hathaway stars as a single mom who goes to a concert with her daughter where she begins a relationship with the lead singer of a beloved boy band (think Harry Styles). Nicholas Galitzine stars as the love interest in the feature which will stream on Amazon.

Fall Guy (May 3). This feature film version of the 1980s TV series follows a Hollywood stuntman who gets embroiled in a real-life crime plot that will require him to use his skills to save the day and the movie he is working on. Ryan Gosling and Emily Blunt co-star in this feature film directed by David Leitch.

Back to Black (May 10). Marisa Abela stars as the late Grammy winner Amy Winehouse in the biopic from Sam Taylor-Johnson.

https://youtu.be/MbvonXc8QjI?si=xElVFjFFSzC3ZPLl

IF (May 17). John Krasinski directs and acts in this feature centering on a young girl (Cailey Fleming) who can see imaginary friends (also known as IFs) and must help IFs who have been abandoned by their kids. Ryan Reynolds leads the Paramount feature that voice stars Steve Carell as an IF named Blue.

Garfield (May 24). Chris Pratt voice stars as the classic comic strip cat, who goes on a heist with his feline father (Samuel L. Jackson) and canine pal Odie (Harvey Guillén). Nicholas Hoult voices Garfield and Odie’s owner, Jon, while Chicken Little filmmaker Mark Dindal directs.

Furiosa (May 24). Nearly a decade after George Miller’s Fury Road was heralded as one of the greatest action films of all time, the filmmaker returns with a prequel centered on the early days of Furiosa, played by Anya Taylor-Joy.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (May 24). Set 300 years after the trilogy of Apes films, this new film, like the classic 1968 Planet of the Apes installment, is set in a time when apes have taken over Earth and humans are subjugated.

Ballerina (June 7). John Wick 4 grossed a series-best $440.1 million. Ballerina will be a new test of the franchise’s strength, with this feature spinoff movie starring Ana De Armas as a ballet dancer / assassin named Rooney.

Inside Out 2 (June 14). The gang is back in this animated follow-up to the beloved Pixar movie that follows the anthropomorphized emotions of a young girl led by Amy Poehler’s Joy. Joining for this round is Anxiety, voiced by Maya Hawke.

Bad Boys 4 (June 14). In many ways, Bad Boys 4 is a much-needed palette cleanser for those involved. For one, it marks Will Smith’s return to the summer blockbusters following his infamous Oscars slap in March 2022, the film arriving nearly 30 years after the 1995 original, directed by Michael Bay.

The Bikeriders (June 21). Disney opted not to release The Bikeriders amid the SAG-AFTRA strike. Focus Features will release this Jeff Nichols-directed movie focusing on the culture of a 1960s Midwestern motorcycle club, the film’s stars: Tom Hardy, Jodie Comer and Austin Butler.

A Quiet Place: Day One (June 28). Six years after John Krasinski launched a new franchise for Paramount, the studio is releasing its first spinoff. Set in New York City on the first day of an alien invasion, the feature originated from an idea Krasinski. Pig’s Michael Sarnoski directs a cast that includes Lupita Nyong’o, Joseph Quinn, Alex Wolff, Djimon Hounsou and Denis O’Hare.

Horizon: An American Saga Chapter 1 (June 28), Chapter 2 (Aug. 16). Kevin Costner’s multi-film western saga has been in the works since 1988, with the star-filmmaker putting at least $20 million of his own money into the project.

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The cinematic landscape of 2024 promises a kaleidoscope of experiences, from the grandeur of Hollywood blockbusters to the intimacy of independent gems discovered at film festivals.

As audiences prepare for a year filled with visual spectacles, emotional journeys, and thought-provoking narratives, the global film industry stands ready to captivate, challenge, and inspire.

Whether it’s the excitement of summer blockbusters or the anticipation of the autumn Oscar season, 2024 is poised to be a remarkable chapter in the ongoing saga of cinema.

#SaveOurParkBoard | Tender Moments of Change at Park Board, Pt 2

In 2012, Vancouver Mayor Gregor Robertson opined about the idea of scaling back Langara Golf Course and turning part of it into residential housing as part of the city’s broad new approach toward creating denser neighbourhoods.

“At this point it is debatable as to whether that is valuable green space,” the mayor said. “The public can’t access it, it is not biodiverse ,” as he went on to suggest that Langara is “underused”, that there may be “opportunities to transform that space, to maintain golf on that site, to increase public access, to increase public housing.”


Pictured: Park Board Commissioners Melissa De Genova, John Coupar, Aaron Jasper, Constance Barnes, Niki Sharma & Trevor Loke. Commissioner Sarah Blyth had stepped out for a moment, during a break.

On July 9, 2012, the Vancouver Park Board met to consider the instruction of Mayor Gregor Robertson to “hive off half of Langara Golf Course for the development of low cost condominiums.”

City Manager Penny Ballem and Mayor Robertson’s Chief of Staff Mike Magee had, previous to the meeting, called in Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioner Aaron Jasper to City Hall to demand he move a motion to redevelop the Langara Golf Course, in order that the Mayor’s wishes might be realized, that half of the golf course would be developed for housing.


Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioner, Aaron Jasper, set to carry out the wishes of the Mayor

Subsequent to Aaron Jasper’s meeting with Ballem and Magee, in an interview with the media, Jasper suggested that the course could be downsized from 18 holes to nine holes, which would free the land for public park space.

Alternatively, Jasper pointed out that the course could be eliminated altogether to develop a full park in its place. Golfers would be redirected to the city’s two other golf courses, McCleery and Fraserview.

One hundred and fifty irate, activist members of the community turned up at the contentious July 9th meeting of Park Board — spanning every age group, from young pre-adolescent children to seniors, with members of the cultural and ethnic mosaic of the Vancouver well-represented among those who had gathered to oppose Mayor Robertson’s “vision” for a redeveloped Langara Golf Course.

More than two dozen speakers slammed the Vancouver Park Board that cool, mid-summer Monday evening, fearing they said that the city-owned Langara golf course might be changed into a park or affordable housing.

Many speakers, as well as Commissioner John Coupar, said they feared the motion to ask staff to compile usage and revenue figures for the city’s golf courses might be the first step toward turning Langara into a park or residential development.

“The way this has been rolled out, I think is a little scary,” Coupar said of the motion, which came after Mayor Gregor Robertson publicly questioned whether Vancouverites are best served by a golf course in the area.

The first speakers to present to the Park Board Commissioners that evening were two 23-year-old women of Chinese descent, who said the following after introducing themselves …

“The two of us grew up in the area surrounding the Langara Golf Course. We grew up in some degree of poverty, living a kind of hand-to-mouth existence. Our parents each ran business, one a small corner store, the other a dry cleaning business. We were often left to our own devices, alone, without much to do. This was in an age prior to social media, when cell phones — which we couldn’t have afforded anyway — were not a feature of life.

With the Langara Golf course nearby, and given that it was the only green space in the neighbourhood, we took to walking around the trails that surround the golf course. Soon, we were running around the golf course, and over the years, from age six through our teens, we continued to run around the trails surrounding Langara. Over time, our running skills were strengthened, we joined the track team at our high school, and not long soon after we were recommended by our PhysEd teachers to the Canada Olympic Committee.

Long story short, the both of us became Olympic gold medal winning runners at the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing. Later this month, we will both be competing again at the London Summer Olympics.

Were it not for the opportunity we were afforded to, over many, many years, to run around the track surrounding the Langara Golf Course, we most certainly would not have become Olympic gold medal winners. Langara is a critical resource to families like ours, a welcoming green space like no other. We do not want to see the Langara Golf Course developed into condominiums.

With all due respect to the Mayor, we are present here tonight to speak against the initiative moved by Commissioner Jasper, on behalf of Mayor Gregor Robertson.”

At the conclusion of the address of the two accomplished young women, applause broke out. Observers, and Park Board staff and Commissioners, could well see that the 150 members of the community who had arrived at the Park Board offices to oppose the initiative of the Mayor to develop the Langara Golf Course were heartened and moved by what they’d heard. A new feeling of hope permeated the room.

The next speakers up were two UBC climate scientists who spoke about climate change, making the case for the preservation of the Langara Golf Course …

“In its present form, as the ‘lungs of our city’, as a health resource for citizens not simply because of the recreational resource it provides, but for the vital role Langara plays in addressing the role of climate change in our city, preservation of the Langara Golf Course must be seen as a paramount consideration.”

The scientists were followed by a groups of baby boomer, Gen X and millennial age women who spoke about the safety that they were afforded in their daily walks on the trails surrounding Langara. “There are always eyes on us. We feel safe. Langara in its present form is an invaluable resource for us. Please do not develop the site.”

Next up: groups of young boys and girls, and seniors, who spoke about their love for golf, about how they could never afford the hundreds and thousands of dollars that would be required to join a private golf course, but that for as little as seven dollars they could afford several hours of play on the Langara Golf Course.

“Better that we should be outside and in the environment,” they averred, “than at home watching TV, or playing video games.”

And with that, the speakers / intervenors / community input portion of the Park Board Committee meeting drew to a close.


Aaron Jasper, Chairperson, Vancouver Park Board, 2012

During the course of the evening, several speakers who had presented to the Commissioners made mention of the fact that the Langara Golf Course was usable only six months of the year. Given the poor / virtually non-existent drainage on the course, users could not play the course when the autumn rainy season began, through the end of March, and sometimes April.

Without asking for remedy to such, Aaron Jasper had the following to say …

“I would like to make a motion asking staff to report back to the Board this upcoming early autumn, with recommendations and costing of installing a proper drainage system within the Langara golf course, such that the course might be used year-round. I would ask for the unanimous support from the Board for the motion I will put on the table.”

Aaron Jasper’s motion passed unanimously.


Sarah Blyth, multi-term Commissioner on the Vancouver Park Board

In a conversation VanRamblings had with former, multi-term Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioner Sarah Blyth earlier this week, she told us the following …

“From time to time, my Vision Park Board colleagues and I found ourselves in conflict with the Mayor, with city staff and our Vision colleagues on Council. Never once, though, were we bullied by the City Manager or the Mayor’s Chief of Staff, and most certainly not by our elected Vision colleagues on City Council.

The Mayor and the Vision Councillors realized that we had been elected by voters to fulfill a mandate to preserve, protect and enhance Vancouver’s parks and recreation system, and to work on behalf of all the citizens of our city to maintain the best parks and recreation system on the continent.”

Did Aaron Jasper, and his Vision Vancouver colleagues on the Park Board, follow the “instruction” of Penny Ballem and Mike Magee to pass a motion that would lead to the halving, at best, of green space on the Langara golf course? No, no, they did not. Instead, as it turned out, in the autumn of that year, the Board unanimously approved a motion from Mr. Jasper to have installed a new drainage system — at a cost of $4 million — on the Langara golf course property, allowing golfers to use the course year-round, more than doubling the revenue derived from Langara, easily “repaying” the initial $4 million restoration expenditure.

And what was the political fallout for Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioners Aaron Jasper, Trevor Loke, Sarah Blyth, Niki Sharma and Sarah Blyth?

Nada, zero, zilch.

The Vision Vancouver Commissioners on Park Board continued on representing the best interests of the citizens of Vancouver, unscathed and much admired.

At the conclusion of the 2014 Vancouver civic election, as the incumbent Vision Vancouver Commissioners chose not to seek another term, Vision Park Board candidate Catherine Evans topped the polls, on a newly reconstituted Vancouver Park Board that saw Michael Wiebe and Stuart Mackinnon elected as Greens on the Board,  with Non-Partisan Association candidate John Coupar re-elected to a further term in office, joined by NPA colleagues Sarah Kirby-Yung, Casey Crawford and Erin Shum, the four emerging as the new majority on the Vancouver Park Board.

What is being left unsaid in this column? Yes, you’re right.


Vancouver Mayor / autocrat “play ball with me, and my office, or consequences will be severe” Ken Sim

Unlike the autocratic “if you step out of line, we’ll end you” ABC Vancouver administration of Mayor Ken Sim, the Vision Vancouver and the Non-Partisan Association Park Boards were left alone by the Boards of Directors of each long serving Vancouver political party, as well as their respective party’s colleagues / elected representatives on Vancouver City Council — free to do their jobs as they best saw fit, the jobs they had been elected to perform, unbidden and unscathed.


For part 1 of this series, click on the following link …

#SaveOurParkBoard | Tender Moments of Change at Park Board, Pt 1


Click / tap on the graphic above to sign  the Save Our Park Board Petition started by Sarah Blyth

#SaveOurParkBoard | Tender Moments of Change at Park Board, Pt 1


The mandate of the elected Vancouver Park Board: building a bridge to a better tomorrow

As the last bastion for civic democracy in our city, the Vancouver Park Board has played a vital role in serving the best environmental, recreational and family interests of the community for more than 133 years, since its founding in 1889.

For many years, members of the community who attended Park Board meetings to address an issue or a “cause” sat at the same table as the elected Park Board Commissioners while addressing their concern, and were successful in having a direct impact on the livability and humanity of our beloved home by the ocean.

Today on VanRamblings, the first of two “stories” revolving around humanity at the Park Board table, specifically involving past Park Board Chairperson John Coupar, as well as Park Board Commissioners Trevor Loke and Constance Barnes, who sat on the 2014  Vancouver Park Board with Commissioners Sarah Blyth, Melissa De Genova and current British Columbia Attorney General, Niki Sharma.

Vancouver Park Board Adopts an Inclusive Trans & Gender-Variant Policy


Trevor Loke, Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioner

At the  May 12, 2013 meeting of Park Board, Commissioner Trevor Loke moved a motion to establish a trans and gender-variant working group, aimed at creating more inclusive spaces for members of the trans and gender-variant communities.

The Park Board Commissioners unanimously supported the motion, drawing a standing ovation from the dozens of supporters of the motion, present in the Park Board meeting room that night, many of the attendees sharing trenchant stories with the Commissioners about their experiences of feeling unwelcome in city facilities, such as recreation centres, swimming pools, and washrooms.

“There are days when with the best intents I’m off to the gym or off to the pool, and I turn around and I go back,” said Drew Dennis, a member of the City of Vancouver’s LGBTQ advisory committee.

One year later, on Monday, April 28, 2014, the Vancouver Park Board’s Trans* and Gender-Variant Inclusion Working Group reported back to the seven Park Board Commissioners gathered at the table, on their engagement findings and priority recommendations, aimed at enhancing service quality and access to facilities.

On that warm, early spring evening, 150 members of the trans and gender-variant community were present in the Park Board meeting room to address the recommendations of the working group, a good number of whom who would come to sit at the Park Board table while speaking to the Commissioners: incredibly articulate physicians employed by Vancouver Coastal who identified themselves as gender-variant persons on the spectrum, who spoke movingly and with spirit.

Young persons, high school students, members of the business community, teachers, lawyers, construction workers, actors and entertainers, seniors, a broad and representative spectrum of members of the cultural and ethnic mosaic communities that comprise and have long defined the Vancouver we know and love.


Constance Barnes, elected Chairperson of the Vancouver Park Board, on December 5, 2011

When it came time for the Commissioners to vote to adopt and establish a 2SLGBTQIA+ policy, the first Commissioner to speak was Vision Vancouver Park Board Commissioner Constance Barnes, who spoke with eloquence in her support of each of the members of the 2SLGBTQIA+ who were present in the room, down the long hallway outside the meeting room, and who had been standing outside the office listening to the speakers, now ready to hear Ms. Barnes’ words.

Constance Barnes’ address to the community gathered in the room, and to her fellow Commissioners, was heartbreakingly poignant, as she spoke of “righting an historical wrong”, of how — as a member of a minority community — she had often found herself excluded and even demeaned, and of how important it was to her that the Board unanimously adopt the motion to establish a 2SLGBTQIA+ policy that, among other initiatives, would construct all new change rooms, including three separate change rooms: Universal (U), Women (W) and Men (M).


John Coupar, long-serving Non-Partisan Association Vancouver Park Board Commissioner

Next to speak: Non-Partisan Association Park Board Commissioner, John Coupar.

“Sitting at the Park Board table this quite wondrous evening, as was clearly the case with my fellow Commissioners, I was heartened and stirred by all that I heard, of the grace and vivid evocation of spirit of all the speakers, your pointed, poignant and potent argumentation for necessary change to establish a fairer and more inclusive society, and the role that the Vancouver Park Board has to play in realizing a more inclusive community for all.

Listening to the speakers who sat at the Park Board table this evening, I was moved. I am changed, forever. For me, the best part of being a Park Board Commissioner is how I am afforded the opportunity to learn about aspects of life about which I was not fully aware. I want to thank you for helping to make me a better, a more whole person, and for working with us to help create a fairer and more inclusive city for all.

2014 is an election year. If I should be so fortunate to  be re-elected to Park Board this autumn, and should I become the Chairperson of the Board, I commit to you tonight, that my first priority will include the construction of the new change rooms that Commissioner Barnes spoke about, but more: I will establish, as was requested this evening, a gender variant swim at the Templeton and Lord Byng pools, and during my next term in office, I will work with the 2SLGBTQIA+ community to create a welcoming environment in our community and aquatic centres, to work with you towards the creation of a fairer community for all.”

Indeed, John Coupar was re-elected as a Park Board Commissioner on Saturday, November 15, 2014, and was soon after inaugurated as Chairperson of the Board at a ceremony held at the VanDusen Botanical Gardens, on December 1, 2014.

Park Board Chairperson John Coupar’s first priority?

Establish a gender-variant swim at each of the Templeton and Lord Byng pools.

Next, Chairperson Coupar instructed Park Board General Manager Malcolm Bromley to begin work on the construction of inclusive change rooms and washroom facilities for members of the trans and gender variant communities.

In the 50+ years VanRamblings has covered the work that takes place at the Vancouver Park Board table, never have we been more moved than was the case this hallowed evening of change for the better, never before or since have we experienced as moving and eloquent a speaker than was the case with Constance Barnes on that particular late evening of April, 2014, and never, ever have we been more proud of an elected official than was the case that halcyon evening, and since, in the person of John Coupar, a true hero in our fair city by the sea.


Click / tap on the graphic above to sign  the Save Our Park Board Petition started by Sarah Blyth