A few years back, actor Crispin Glover had, what appeared to be, a nervous breakdown while visiting David Letterman’s late night show on NBC. Subsequent to Glover’s onstage antics, Letterman swore that Marty McFly’s dad would never appear on his show again. Well, here it is a new millennium, and VanRamblings learns (c/o All Things Christie) that Mr. Glover wasn’t suffering from acute psychological distress, rather … he was making like Art Linkletter’s worst nightmare. Here is Crispin Glover ‘kicking it’ on the Letterman show. Funnier Than Anchorman: Will Ferrell Makes Like Bush
After spending over $75 million on fraudulent attacks, Bush White House apparatchik Karl Rove is back to selling the true Texas cowboy. Throughout August, Bush campaign commercials will feature President Bush at his ranch in Crawford, Texas. What will these commercials look like? Comedian Will Ferrell takes us for a behind-the-scenes look at ‘White House West’. Summer at the Movies. A Video With More Heart Than I Robot
Migawd, this has been one lousy summer at the movies. There are no sleepers. Not one film has broken out, unexpectedly, to emerge as a hit. Second week box office drop-offs remain in the 60% range, and from Van Helsing to The Village and The Manchurian Candidate, this has been a summer of disappointment for most dedicated movie-goers. Fortunately, VanRamblings comes to the rescue tonight, presenting this heartfelt glimpse into our future, a video
that is everything that I Robot could never hope to be, whatever the budget.
You’ve heard about it elsewhere, but VanRamblings has the naughty pictures and the whole salacious story (courtesy of Olde Blighty’s News of the World), all for you.
According to Britain’s favourite scandal rag, former ’NSYNC member and current pop prince Justin Timberlake spent two sizzling nights with model Lucy Clarkson (pictured to your right), while Justin’s girlfriend, Cameron Diaz, was 5,000 miles away in Los Angeles playing domestic goddess.
Still and all, according to the voluptuous Lucy Clarkson, neither she nor he scored …
“I kept saying to him that I wasn’t ready and he kept asking me why. I told him we didn’t have condoms. But it was obvious he was desperate to make love.”
For more on Justin’s boob fetish, take a moment to read the whole romantic, silly, virtually chaste, rock ’n roll story … here. Star’s Gone From Superbabe To Wreck of the Month
Sure, they call her the Princess of Pop, the blonde babe whose sexy videos are as memorable as her catchy singles.
But just four months before her wedding, Britney Spears’ drop-dead gorgeous looks seemed to, well, have dropped dead.
At 22, riddled with spots, the once sleek and chiseled Britney now has a double chin, puffy eyes, droopy boobs and wrinkles.
The whole sordid story is available here. Read it and weep.
In a global exclusive, News of the World has broken the outrageous, tantalizing, titillating and salacious story, Britney was my sex-mad bride (brought to you by VanRamblings for posterity) of just how Britney Spears “bedded her childhood sweetheart (Jason Alexander, 22) ‘like an animal’, then wrecked his life with a 55-hour marriage than stunned the world.”
“We made love in her bed, her shower and her bath,” says Jason. “She asked me to marry her but when the lawyers demanded I end our marriage she didn’t stop them — and it caused chaos in my life.”
VanRamblings’ big mooshy, gooshy heart goes out to poor boy, Jason. Couple Has Sex On Stage During Rock Concert
Fun-loving couple have sex on rock concert stage
As Kristopher Schau and his band Cumshots were in the middle of their concert, a young couple entered the stage, stripped and had sex on stage during the concert. See photos here and here.
The young couple, Tommy Hol Ellingsen, age 28, and Leona Johansson, age 21, are members of the environmental organization Fuck the Forest. They have sex in public in order to put focus on the rainforest. The last time Ellingsen and Johansson had public sex, they collected US$14,677, but nobody wanted to take the money.
“The goal is to take over the entire commercial porn industry and transfer all the money to protection of the environment,” Ellingsen explained. However, Norway’s Rainforest Foundation is far from thrilled by the way the small organization has chosen to raise money.
“I cannot see that this helps the work for the rainforest,” says Lars Lövold, of Rainforest Foundation Norway. “Generally speaking, we accept donations, but if the money is coming from illegal activity, from someone who abuses the rainforest or wishes to abuse our name, we say ‘No thank you’. This may be the case here.”
The police are investigating if the case is a possible breach of the criminal code’s paragraph 2001 regarding indecent conduct. The sentencing for such crimes is as much as one year in jail or fines. Tara Reid Takes The Girls For A Test Drive
Looks like our favourite 20-something actress / model / multi-time dumpee, Tara Reid, went for the full meal deal when she decided on breast augmentation surgery. Not for her the modest, demure look. Instead, Tara is out every night on the Hollywood scene, sporting her new ‘friends’. And she accomplishes exactly what by opting for bigger boobs? Pictures Galore: Hilary and Britney Go Shopping, While Kirsten …
Here’s teen queen Hilary Duff on the town with her boyfriend, just coming home from a shopping trip. Meanwhile, Britney and her new beau, Kevin Federline, are locking lips on the balcony, providing the paparazzi with this prize-winning shot; by the way, here’s Shar Jackson, Kevin’s most recent squeeze, and mommy-to-be with his kid … oh, did we forget to mention, that this will be Kevin’s 2nd child with Shar?).
And, let’s not forget about Hollywood’s cutest young couple, Kirsten Dunst and Jake Gyllenhaal, pictured here at the première screening of Spider-man 2.
Then there’s a particularly hideous Paris Hilton in her new Guess ad. Scary, huh?
After a two-week absence (that darn Canadian election — don’t forget, read the whole thing now), your favourite VanRamblings feature is BACK !!! Yes, we’re here to dish the dirt, fill your head full of naughty notions, and just generally engage in some gossip mayhem. So, let’s get started, eh? Know Your Celebrity House-Husbands: Meet Mr. Mira Sorvino
Paul Sorvino must be one proud papa, knowing his Oscar-winning daughter, Mira, 36, married 22-year-old Kid Rock look-a-like Chris “Goofy” Backus in a private ceremony at the Santa Barbara courthouse on June 11th.
Heck, there was a time when Mira dated Quentin and French sex symbol Olivier Martinez, and yes we remember that Mira was named one of the 50 Most Beautiful by People in 1996. But look who she’s ended up with — a Kansas City born graduate of Shawnee Mission High School, and current waiter / aspiring actor!
Backus’ mom Terry, now living in North Carolina, tells VanRamblings that Mira is not the first Hollywood hottie her son has hooked up with:
“I can tell you this, Britney Spears picked him up. Carmen Electra took him out, too.”
Wow. And to think that after all that he settled for a Harvard grad. Take A Break From Barbecues And That Low-Carb Beer
Here’s a look at the Top 5 films this weekend, playing at a theatre near you.
1. Spiderman 2 – $127.8 million (as of Saturday) Well, well, well. Looks like the much-anticipated Spidey sequel has woven its web around a gargantuan audience, breaking the $114.8 million opening weekend box office record of its predecessor, not least because Spider-Man 2 opened to a spectacular $40.4 million on Wednesday.
2. Fahrenheit 9/11 – $50 million (cume total)
Michael Moore’s film is playing in 1000 more theatres this weekend, and although the per theatre revenue is down, box office remains strong. There’s no rush to see Fahrenheit 9/11 — it’s gonna be around a long time.
3. White Chicks – $41.9 million (11 days)
One of the worst reviewed films of 2004 hangs on against all odds.
4. Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story – $82.2 million (16 days)
Ben Stiller. Vince Vaughn. Funny. What can we say?
5. The Notebook – $26.9 million (9 days)
Major weepy. A high-toned cinematic greeting card … but it works. First, War With Michael Eisner … Now This
Who couldn’t love that big lovable mug, huh? Well, apparently not Mrs. Miramax, Eve Chilton Weinstein, who after 18 years of marriage is taking her leave of the rotund one — the often less than affable Harvey Weinstein (pictured left), co-founder of the Miramax film studio — along with the pre-nup negotiated multi-million dollar divorce settlement, and making like Harvey’s dinner (which is to say, gone). Poor, poor, humble Harvey.
According to the New York Post’s Page 6 …
Eve, a tall blonde beauty who could have been one of Alfred Hitchcock’s leading ladies, was Harvey’s assistant in the early days of Miramax. Weinstein — a workaholic who puts in 18-hour days — purportedly promised Eve last year he’d cut down and spend more time on the home front.
Apparently, he didn’t “cut down.” Sayonara Harv. Nice knowin’ ya. Here Comes Britney The Bride … Pregnant !!!
Although Britney Spears’ upcoming nuptials will be a far cry from the quickie Vegas wedding she had last time around, News of the World reports that the pop queen is several months preggers.
Britney’s intended, Kevin Federline, appeared in the movie You Got Served, and was as a backup dancer for singer Justin Timberlake, Spears’ former boytoy.
Recently (and we mean, up until days ago) Federline was involved with actress Shar Jackson, of TV’s Moesha. They have a 2-year-old daughter together and are expecting another baby this month!
Spears recently cancelled her summer tour because of a “knee injury” she reportedly suffered during a video shoot. Shyeeah, right … Reborn On The Third of July
In further Tinseltown pregger news this week … E-Online is reporting that Demi Moore is pregnant … Liv Tyler is also reportedly expecting her first child. Ms. Tyler and her husband Royston Langdon, from the band Spacehog, haven’t released a statement yet, but People magazine suggests the baby is due this winter … Claudia Schiffer is pregnant with her second child. The gorgeous German supermodel and her film producer husband Matthew Vaughn already have a 17-month-old son, Caspar, and have reportedly told friends their second child is due to arrive at the end of the year. Rich and beautiful celebs, they‘re sort of a fecund lot, aren’t they?
That’s it for this week, folks. See ya next Saturday night.
